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Hogan Torah

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Published in

The Memoirist

·1 day ago

The First Person I Punched in The Face Was a Cop Because He Was Asking for It

How I punched an LAPD detective in the face and didn’t go to jail — In my freshman year of high school, I had my lunch stolen out of my hands in the middle of the quad. I watched while the kid ate my food in front of me. My friends said nothing. The other people who saw me get jacked laughed. The next day…

Memoir

4 min read

The First Person I Punched in The Face Was a Cop Because He Was Asking for It
The First Person I Punched in The Face Was a Cop Because He Was Asking for It
Memoir

4 min read


Published in

The Mitch

·1 day ago

The Real Story Behind the Bloodninja Saga Chat Logs

I am the creator of the Bloodninja chats, but I’m not the creator of the Bloodninja — I am Hogan Torah, creator of one of the first viral memes ever. The legendary Bloodninja chatlogs. Best known for the line. I put on my robe and wizard hat. For those of you unfamiliar with the Bloodninja saga, it’s an instant messenger chat where I role play with randos…

Humor

4 min read

The Real Story Behind the Bloodninja Saga Chat Logs
The Real Story Behind the Bloodninja Saga Chat Logs
Humor

4 min read


Published in

Fuck Niches

·4 days ago

How to Become the GigaChad of Your Dreams

Be confident of your confidence — There’s no crisis in masculinity. This generation lacks confidence. Not getting killed in a war used to build confidence. Our ancestors became men on the battlefield. Today Battlefield is a video game. If someone dies, they respawn. How do you build confidence today? According to Chat GPT, meditating, improving posture…

Masculinity

6 min read

How to Become the GigaChad of Your Dreams
How to Become the GigaChad of Your Dreams
Masculinity

6 min read


May 13

Dating a Writer Living in a Different Country

Only 250 miles away but living worlds apart — I found her on Medium but we connected on Twitter. It was about time Twitter got me laid. For the longest time Twitter was the only social media site that I hadn’t found someone to sleep with on. For those who missed my story a year ago, I’m dating adjacent…

Travel

5 min read

Dating a Writer Living in a Different Country
Dating a Writer Living in a Different Country
Travel

5 min read


May 12

The “Stop Hurting my Mommy” Story

I experienced the worst interruption during sex imaginable — The year was 2003. Nu-metal had reached its zenith and Emo was ripe to take it’s place. Aiding the cultural shift was a new website called MySpace. MySpace was everyone’s first social media site. You could design your own profile with HTML to attract new friends. You could also post…

Humor

4 min read

The “Stop Hurting my Mommy” Story
The “Stop Hurting my Mommy” Story
Humor

4 min read


Published in

Just Dope

·May 12

He’s a Scumbag With Heart of Gold

My drug dealer stopped talking to me because he cares — The relationship an addict has with their dealer is the only relationship that matters to an addict. Friends and family become nothing but resources for an addict to use, deplete, and discard. I was an addict. The proper thing to say is I still am. The first year of sobriety…

Addiction

10 min read

He’s a Scumbag With Heart of Gold
He’s a Scumbag With Heart of Gold
Addiction

10 min read


Published in

Fuck Niches

·May 9

The Problem with Being a Dick

Humor is a defense mechanism — In 2016 I had a house, family, friends, cars, six figure income and smoked heroin on the weekend. By 2017 I was living out of my car slamming dope. When 2019 rolled in I was done with life. My car was impounded for expired tags, and I lost my nut…

Addiction

4 min read

The Problem with Being a Dick
The Problem with Being a Dick
Addiction

4 min read


Published in

Write! Right? Write!

·Apr 30

How to Weaponize Your Writing Against Plagiarism

Why I didn’t mind when my writing was stolen and reported for a copyright violation — The first time someone took credit for my work I was furious. I pledged vendetta and burned a picture of a saint. After doing some digging, I found the website was owned by a Chinese company and there wasn’t anything I could do. I found more of my stories on…

Copywriting

6 min read

How to Weaponize Your Writing Against Plagiarism
How to Weaponize Your Writing Against Plagiarism
Copywriting

6 min read


Apr 29

From Powder To Pill: How Pressed MDMA Changed the Underground

The impact MDMA pills had on rave culture — “Check these out.” My supplier said handing me a pill. “Neat.” I said looking at the Mitsubishi logo impressed into a round pill. “What is it?” “That is a pressed MDMA tablet.” He said proudly. The late 90’s was the peak of rave culture. The drug of choice was acid…

Drugs

6 min read

From Powder To Pill: How Pressed MDMA Changed the Underground
From Powder To Pill: How Pressed MDMA Changed the Underground
Drugs

6 min read


Published in

Fanfare

·Apr 28

The Worst Movies on the List of the Top 100 Movies of All Time

Classic doesn’t always mean good — What are the best movies of all time? My Google search first result was this IMDB list. It isn’t definitive, but it’s a credible source. Top 100 Greatest Movies of All Time (The Ultimate List) - IMDb The movies on this list are ranked according to their success (awards & nominations), their popularity, and their…www.imdb.com For the most part I agree with the list. I’ll admit there’s a lot of older movies I’ve never seen. I’ll give those the benefit…

Movies

4 min read

The Worst Movies on the List of the Top 100 Movies of All Time
The Worst Movies on the List of the Top 100 Movies of All Time
Movies

4 min read

Hogan Torah

Hogan Torah

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The Anti-Influencer 👨‍🎤 Storyteller📖Google me I autofill🕶️

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