Image by Hogan Torah. Hey! That’s Me!

GIMMIE A HELL YEAH

Funny Funny Favorite Fuckstories Fo’ Free During December

Cause Stone Cold says so happy holidays I love you all

Hey folks. The holidays are just around the corner. And if you’re like me that means nothing to you. You have no one to buy gifts for, you were invited to no holiday parties, and you don’t give a fuck.

But more than likely you got married and had kids because you don’t have dark triad traits that drive everyone away from you like me. For my readers living a normal life, I salute you.

Do something for your yourself this holiday season. Relax and have a giggle at my top 7 best funny dirty stories.

7. My first viral story. It’s all title. And I didn’t even write the title. Ryan Fan did. He gave it to me in the MuddyUm chat room. Ryan can’t be writing stories about incest porn. He’s Ryan Fan.

6. Don’t you hate it when you go with co-workers to Mazitlan on a 3 day weekend Carnival booze cruise and you wind up a brothel? True story.

5. This one didn’t do so hot. Probably the picture. So I changed it to one of the pictures I have up on Pexels. I’ll have you know that I’m the 42,681 most viewed photographer on that site.

4. From here out these are the best of the best. These are something special. It overlaps with #5 a bit, but it needed it’s own story. This one is slowly gaining numbers every day.

3. I have been sent more unsolicited nudes than anyone alive. Mostly of dicks. This is my story.

2. This is close to my favorite story of mine. I’m really pleased with the way it came out. It’s nor even really about eating ass. All I can tell you is it’s not what you think it is.

  1. One day I’m browsing Medium, and saw my ex-girlfriend’s name. The title of her story was Quiz: Children’s Lit or Erotica? I was like, who else could it be? Yeah, it was totally her. I’m talking ex from twenty years ago. She was my first love. When we realized who each other was she searched my stories for her name. She found a comment where I named her but I don’t know if she ever saw this. Putting a name to one of my ubiquitous ex girlfriends. This is a story about the kinds of things Marthea Webber and I did around the turn of the century.

Top writer in whatever he damn well pleases. Satirist. Polymath. Dark empath. Yee-haw! Google me, I auto fill. Professional inquires/nudes to hogantorah@gmail