I MAKE YOU LAUGH BUT I’M NOT A JOKE

The Problem with Being a Dick

Humor is a defense mechanism

Hogan Torah
4 min readMay 9, 2023

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Photo by Nikita Korchagin from Pexels

In 2016 I had a house, family, friends, cars, six figure income and smoked heroin on the weekend. By 2017 I was living out of my car slamming dope.

When 2019 rolled in I was done with life. My car was impounded for expired tags, and I lost my nut. A nut is the minimum amount of money professional gamblers need to not lose to buy into the next game. I didn’t have the money to buy drugs to sell to my clients to feed my own addiction.

I would go through withdrawals for weeks. As soon as I started feeling better, I’d make enough money to get more drugs and the cycle would begin again. Suicide became an increasingly appealing option. I would have stepped in front of a train, but I knew my dog would be sad.

When you’re totally fucked, all you can do is laugh. Every day I woke up but there was nothing to get out of bed for, you need to be able to laugh at life. Homeless people need to have a sense of humor of they want to make it through the day.

Wanna know why the best comedians are black? Because society treats all but the richest black people like they’re guilty of a crime all the time when existing there’s two options. Get angry and make things worse, or laugh at…

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Hogan Torah

Counterculture journalist 💊 dating drugs music fun 🤪 Google me, I autofill 🕶️